HtmlToText
wish i were here journeys through place and time menu skip to content home copyright & contact published work you are here search search for: the road to bliss september 11, 2018 september 20, 2018 / j.d. riso / 92 comments harbor springs, michigan – april 2018 out of all the places to work, how can i be here again? the little white church, the quaint storefronts, the historic homes. this town hasn’t changed at all in thirty-two years. such a long drive from my forest sanctuary. i felt a tug in this direction, but ignored it, and then a closer possibility fell through. the general manager greets me with arms outstretched. a welcome home, long lost gesture. i’m hired within five minutes and we part with hugs instead of handshakes. i should know by now to not ignore intuition. there’s a reason why i was drawn back here. a cinematic clarity infuses this new old life. then and now become a double-exposed movie. circa 1986 in grainy, pink-tinged vhs superimposed on 2018 in sharp, flat digital. sometimes the ghost of who i used to be passes through me. the rage-fueled ambition. the impatience. my whole life was ahead of me. it still is. more than ever. i work in the pantry, making salads for rich people. i work six days a week, sometimes double shifts. i’m saving up to move to california. i would’ve moved out there already, but my grandparents said seventeen is too young for a girl to move across the country alone. the waiters and waitresses glide through the kitchen, so elegant in their black tuxedos. working, doing coke, and screwing around is all they have in their lives. i have a chip on my shoulder, they say. angry little girl. what the fuck do they know about my life? my dad went crazy and school was absolute hell. of course the stupid bitches here hate me. people are always going to hate me. this establishment has changed in almost every way except name. except for a cook and a waitress, everyone i worked with is gone. the tuxedoed elegance has been replaced by rumpled, disheveled indifference. the dress code now is to simply be dressed. i work in the manager’s office, isolated from the chaos of the restaurant below. my job is to arrange the antique boat cruises that leave from the deck bar. captains and first mates are my closest colleagues. first mate taylor is seventy-five. she swears like the sailor that she is. there’s nowhere to hide from her ice blue eyes. she loves to hear stories of the places i’ve been, the things i’ve done. “what did you do for work out there?” i rattle off the jobs i’ve held since i was last here: fine dining waitress, massage therapist, secretary, stripper, travel agent, french-english translator, voiceover artist for radio, and, for so very long, english teacher. for three years, i had a country music show on radio new caledonia. in french and under a pseudonym. listeners adored my heavy american accent. that one makes people laugh, but they are most fascinated by the stripper years. the hollywood dive i worked in and my encounters with the famous. taylor shakes her head. “after everything you’ve experienced, you’re now stuck in that shithole of an office.” “you know what? i couldn’t ask for a better job to reintroduce me to america. it’s seasonal, unique, and i work with the best people ever. i’m unbelievably grateful and happy to be here. really.” she shakes her head in disbelief and putters away. in their corner of the office, the managers discuss figures and strategies. problems with staff and customers. i admire their passion. small talk about television shows, the weather, and small town drama. no politics, thankfully. the world is all i’ve got to talk about. it’s the mundane that’s exotic. i participate, but eventually my mind drifts off. simple things have their charm and lessons, but there is also so much more. when people ask me what i plan to be when i get to california, i say, free. raised eyebrows, eye rolls, snorts of contempt. i think my life will always be lonely, but at least i won’t be like them. spring morphs into summer. the interns become my buddies. they linger in the office when the managers aren’t around. they confide in me and ask for advice. as if i’m an expert on anything. luke’s broken heart. “someone better is coming your way. you’ll see.” allie’s crush. “just go for it. rejection is much easier to live with than regret over missed opportunities.” the anxiety and excitement about their future. “you’re going to make mistakes. just try to learn from them and move on.” tj is my favorite. our conversations involve syd barrett and terence mckenna and what it means to be crazy in a crazy world. he gives me hope for the future. he can’t talk about this stuff with his girlfriend. he wants to break up, but he doesn’t want to hurt her. “you’re so young. you need to have your heart broken and you need to break hearts. if you’re sensitive, it can be harder to be the one to leave.” a searing pain moves through my chest. “but it has to be done. wait for the one who lights up your spirit, who sees you. who scares you so much that you want to run away. that’s the one who will make you grow.”a flash of her face, of them together. “you have such an amazing life ahead.” he beams as he strides out of the room. “you’re such a bright person, julie. a light. you’re awesome.” i lean back in my battered chair and stare up at the watermarks on the ceiling. i am the person i needed all those years ago. he calls me his little witch, because i remind him of stevie nicks. he’s twenty-six and works as a cook. we were friends, but when i turned eighteen things between us changed. he’s only my second boyfriend. when he stays the night at the cottage, he picks wildflowers and lays them all over me before i wake up. i didn’t know that love could make everything bad melt away. the things i pretend not to see: the stifled snickers and smirks that the waitresses shoot in my direction. the lingering touches they give him. the photo of his ex-wife that he keeps on his bedside table. she’s little, like me, and has long, beautiful hair and big blue eyes. a doll’s gaze, flat and filled with menace. when she calls, he goes running. when he returns to me, eyes wild with pain, he shows me no mercy. in the quiet mornings before work, i walk out to the end of the pier. vessels of various sizes float on the placid water. the transients that arrive with summer: the high-ranking politician, the rock star, the old industrial money, the wayward souls on the way to someplace else. i dive deep and conjure up a face from the watery depths of memory. he’s sat in my section every day since he’s been here. red hair. soft-spoken. eyes fierce with determination. he’s about to sail around the world. the night before he leaves, he invites me to his sailboat. i am also leaving for my destiny, california, in a few days. he makes margaritas, the kind with grand marnier. he remembered that it’s my favorite drink. after a couple of those, we say fuck it and drink straight from the tequila bottle. we bray along to the radio until the other boaters scream at us to shut up. i decide that if he makes a move, i will let him. anything to kill the pain of my shattered heart. but he doesn’t lay a hand on me, except to give me a big hug goodbye. the next day, his boat slip is empty. a gaping void. farewell, sailor. see you at the edge of the world and beyond. county road 77 heads north out of town towards a village called bliss. follow the signs. destination: destiny. there’s something special about this area with its farms and bogs and impenetrable forests. deep rolling hills ripple across the landscape. they’re called moraines, created when the glaciers from the last ice age receded. the bliss that has taken hold of me these past few months. effervescence like a pleasurable itch. is it possible to have too much? when it ebbs away, i’m relieved. i don’t ever want it to stop being special, and i know it will be back. primary emotions have transformed into subt
Informations Whois
Whois est un protocole qui permet d'accéder aux informations d'enregistrement.Vous pouvez atteindre quand le site Web a été enregistré, quand il va expirer, quelles sont les coordonnées du site avec les informations suivantes. En un mot, il comprend ces informations;
Domain Name: JDRISO.COM
Registry Domain ID: 1742215287_DOMAIN_COM-VRSN
Registrar WHOIS Server: whois.ovh.com
Registrar URL: http://www.ovh.com
Updated Date: 2017-08-08T08:44:34Z
Creation Date: 2012-09-02T19:02:13Z
Registry Expiry Date: 2018-09-02T19:02:13Z
Registrar: OVH
Registrar IANA ID: 433
Registrar Abuse Contact Email:
Registrar Abuse Contact Phone:
Domain Status: clientDeleteProhibited https://icann.org/epp#clientDeleteProhibited
Domain Status: clientTransferProhibited https://icann.org/epp#clientTransferProhibited
Name Server: NS1.WORDPRESS.COM
Name Server: NS2.WORDPRESS.COM
Name Server: NS3.WORDPRESS.COM
DNSSEC: unsigned
URL of the ICANN Whois Inaccuracy Complaint Form: https://www.icann.org/wicf/
>>> Last update of whois database: 2017-08-19T12:46:33Z <<<
For more information on Whois status codes, please visit https://icann.org/epp
NOTICE: The expiration date displayed in this record is the date the
registrar's sponsorship of the domain name registration in the registry is
currently set to expire. This date does not necessarily reflect the expiration
date of the domain name registrant's agreement with the sponsoring
registrar. Users may consult the sponsoring registrar's Whois database to
view the registrar's reported date of expiration for this registration.
TERMS OF USE: You are not authorized to access or query our Whois
database through the use of electronic processes that are high-volume and
automated except as reasonably necessary to register domain names or
modify existing registrations; the Data in VeriSign Global Registry
Services' ("VeriSign") Whois database is provided by VeriSign for
information purposes only, and to assist persons in obtaining information
about or related to a domain name registration record. VeriSign does not
guarantee its accuracy. By submitting a Whois query, you agree to abide
by the following terms of use: You agree that you may use this Data only
for lawful purposes and that under no circumstances will you use this Data
to: (1) allow, enable, or otherwise support the transmission of mass
unsolicited, commercial advertising or solicitations via e-mail, telephone,
or facsimile; or (2) enable high volume, automated, electronic processes
that apply to VeriSign (or its computer systems). The compilation,
repackaging, dissemination or other use of this Data is expressly
prohibited without the prior written consent of VeriSign. You agree not to
use electronic processes that are automated and high-volume to access or
query the Whois database except as reasonably necessary to register
domain names or modify existing registrations. VeriSign reserves the right
to restrict your access to the Whois database in its sole discretion to ensure
operational stability. VeriSign may restrict or terminate your access to the
Whois database for failure to abide by these terms of use. VeriSign
reserves the right to modify these terms at any time.
The Registry database contains ONLY .COM, .NET, .EDU domains and
Registrars.
REGISTRAR OVH
SERVERS
SERVER com.whois-servers.net
ARGS domain =jdriso.com
PORT 43
TYPE domain
RegrInfo
DOMAIN
NAME jdriso.com
CHANGED 2017-08-08
CREATED 2012-09-02
STATUS
clientDeleteProhibited https://icann.org/epp#clientDeleteProhibited
clientTransferProhibited https://icann.org/epp#clientTransferProhibited
NSERVER
NS1.WORDPRESS.COM 198.181.116.9
NS2.WORDPRESS.COM 198.181.117.9
NS3.WORDPRESS.COM 192.0.74.9
REGISTERED yes
Go to top
jdriso.com rapport :
Visitez le site